Chill
by Ardna
Summary: It's the end of Loki's final battle. And he always knew it was going to be this way.


_**Warnings:** violence and character death._

* * *

The blow hits him in the gut, fierce, cruel, carrying the brutality so typical of Asgardians. Loki feels his bones splinter and organs tear as Mjolnir slams into him, and knows that Thor has thrown his weapon to kill.

Loki falls, hitting the ground with his back as the air is driven completely out of him. He lies helplessly there, his body trying futilely to curl into itself to escape the pain. Really, he can't do anything else.

Thor lifts Mjolnir away, practically flinging it to the side as he crashes to his knees beside the fallen Loki. His hands, just as terrifyingly strong as they have always been, cup around Loki's face. Tears are spilling from his older brother's eyes, and Thor looks as if he never intends to halt the flow.

"Why did you make me do this, brother?" he demands with a sob. "Why didn't you stop?"

"It's alright," Loki whispers, a groan escaping as the pain shudders up and down his body. "It's alright, Thor. Don't you understand? It was always going to end this way."

"No, it wasn't!" Thor cries. "You could have stopped, Loki! The power was in your hands all along!"

"Nothing was in my hands, Thor," Loki says tiredly. "Nothing was ever put there. I tried to grab a hold, but you can see how well that has served me."

His hands are growing cold, he can feel it. He shivers, frightened to look down and see what's happening. Better not to know. Thor sees his trembling and pulls him closer, lifting Loki up some by placing an arm underneath his back. Loki's sharp cry of pain forces him to let him back down again.

"Loki…" Thor seems to be grief-stricken to the point of confusion. The Mighty Thor, more helpless than Loki has ever seen him. He is too cold, too in pain, to feel victorious. "Brother…"

"Sh," Loki says, and without thinking lifts a hand to touch Thor's face. He recoils at the sight of the accursed blue skin, mangled by Jotun tattoos. A further reminder of what he really is. So that is why he has been feeling cold.

"Don't worry, Thor," Loki says, his voice trembling. "It's better now. I'm going to die, it's alright."

"No, no, it's not," Thor answers, shaking his head and causing more tears to spill. "Loki, there must be a way. You must know a way. You know all the ways!"

"Thor, you have no idea," Loki says brokenly. "Of all Asgardians, I was said to be the cleverest, the most intelligent. My mind… it's so _vast_, Thor, it frightens me, and when Odin… when I found out… everything was cast into confusion. My great, massive mind became a churning mess. A prison. But now everything's clear." Loki smiles with relief. "I can die. That ends it, Thor, don't you see? I don't have to hurt anymore."

Thor's not the only one crying. Both brothers weep, tears mingling.

"Thor, don't you understand?" Loki whispers. "We were always heading for this. Now I'll finally be free."

His hands are shaking. Thor's are still holding his face, and Loki is certain that his elder brother will never tear his eyes away. That's comforting. The last thing he'll see is his brother's gaze. Brother. Despite everything that had happened, Loki had never been able to stop thinking of him that way.

"Stop talking like this, Loki," Thor says, trying to be stern. "You are not dead yet. We can get you back to Asgard, take you to the healing rooms…"

"I'm done, Thor," Loki says, and Thor's mouth snaps shut, his eyes bleeding agony. "I don't want to do this anymore. I am finished."

Thor's left hand grips Loki's right, the other holds Loki's face. His skin has converted entirely to its Jotun state, but part of his face is still Asgardian, the part Thor's hand touches. One red eye and one blue one gaze up and Thor, and Loki is at peace. He is smiling.

A chuckle escapes from Loki. "You know, Thor—"

He stops. His eyes aren't moving anymore, hold no light. Thor's hand grips Loki's so tight it's a wonder the bones don't splinter. The tears have long since soaked through his beard. "Loki?"

He doesn't answer. His labored breathing, so audible just a few seconds ago, can no longer be heard.

"Loki, answer me," Thor says desperately. His face crumples and he cries, "Loki, let this be another trick! Please trick me one last time! _Loki!_"

But the still form does not reply. It does not disappear. Loki of Asgard has escaped, for the very last time. He is finally at rest, but Thor will long carry the grief of a failed brotherhood.

Thor whirls around and faces his fellow Avengers, silent and grim. "Is there anything? Anything you can do?" he pleads.

They stare back at him sorrowfully. Tony shakes his head and says he can't raise people from the dead. Clint utters no word but he seems to be disappointed that it has come to this. Steve, Bruce, and Natasha all confirm that although mighty in battle, there is nothing they can do to bring back one who is already lost.

Thor turns away from them and slowly walks back to where Loki's body lies, weeping as he lifts his brother from the ground. The Avengers hesitate, uncertain as to whether they should go to Thor or leave him alone with his grief. Clint's eyes close for a moment, and as he opens them again he reluctantly steps forward, placing a hand on Thor's arm.

Thor spares him only a glance. "I get it," is all Clint says. And he does. Possibly more than anyone else here. The others hesitantly gather around: Steve, Tony, Natasha, Bruce. They don't say anything, but they don't have to. In time, none of them is without tears. If not for Loki, then it's for Thor they cry.

Thor cradles Loki's body closer. "I'm taking him home," he says quietly. He walks away and doesn't call for Heimdall, but the Bifrost opens the moment he looks up.


End file.
